What Women Want (from men)???

The top 6 things women want FROM MEN, in order, are:

1. Women want men who exhibit confidence (or power)
2. Women want men with a sense of humor (fun)
3. Women want men with money or the things money can buy (sense of security)
4. Women want men with looks (protection and attraction)
5. Women want men with a bit of "Bad boy" qualities (mysterious and independent/strong)
6. Women want all the other stuff they typically list (varies - sensitive, caring, etc.)



Men can get what they want from women much more frequently when they approach women with a few simple - yet effective - guidelines:

1. Women want a man to be confident! Confidence is the number one quality women look for. Don't be wimpy. Don't apologize for everything. Be real. Be you.

2. Women want a man who makes her feel like she's the only one. Women go nuts over a man who will go the extra mile. For example, he opens the door for her, he walks on the right side of the street, he helps her shop. I'm talking about being a GENTLEMAN! If she is cold, offer her your jacket. If she is in trouble, protect her. If there is danger, put your arm around her. Be a real man.

3. Women want a man with a sense of humor. A woman will almost always love a man who can make her laugh. If you are dull, you are boring. If you make a woman laugh, you're halfway home. Take a chance, be real, but be funny. There are several seduction experts who claim that being "cocky" and "funny" are the two most important qualities to attracting a woman. I agree.

4. Women want a man to listen to them (yes, even to the gripes and details of all the craziness) and not necessarily give advice. Many women love to complain about their problems; however, they complain not to receive advice, but merely to sound off. I know it's hard to nod and be supportive, because you want to watch ESPN or do something that to you may seem more exciting, but the fact is, your woman will go to the ends of the earth to love you when you truly listen to them and acknowledge their needs. You need to understand that women need to VENT. Allow her this, and she'll allow you in. Nod. Get involved and provide active listening feedback. Be truly interested in what she is saying without worrying about what you're going to say next. Then, watch what happens as your woman opens up to you more.

Women want men to listen to them, because they have a need to be heard. And, women want their man to express his feelings and trust her with his intimate side. Real listening, with real intimacy, is rare. Real listening is suspending thinking about what to say and being deeply engaged in what she is talking about. Listening requires actively paying attention -- shutting off the chatter mind.

5. Women want men to treat them like they are the sexiest woman on the planet and that no other woman compares. Talking about your ex-girlfriends is not going to score big points with your new woman. Treating her like she's the ONLY one will make her smile for quite a while.

6. Women want loyal men. Women want to know you will be faithful. Don't tell a woman how you cheated on your ex. It won't make her think you are wise, loyal, or trustworthy. I'm not saying to lie to her -- just don't go there. Don't cheat on your woman. She will not think you are a better man for doing this. Just like you want think you are the only man she's ever loved, well, that's the thing she wants, too. The key to faithfulness comes from your own inner character. Be a man of character and you will reap a relationship built upon trust. You gain respect through consistent committed action. Respect backed up by love builds trust, trust builds a strong relationship that can stand the tests of life and time.

7. Women SAY they want a sensitive man. Truth is, if you go around apologizing all the time and crying frequently then a woman will abuse you. Trust me, it is NOT wise to do. This was well exemplified during the beach scene in the movie Bedazzled, where the main character in the film was trying to woo his love interest, his advice had been to "be more sensitive." Well, he went so overboard, was so sensitive, that his love interest ended up walking away with another dude with the assumption that they'd have meaningless conversation and casual sex! Boy was HE surprised! Being overly sensitive is a quick way to get shown the door. It is important to strike a balance. Be strong, be there, yet share your emotions. Speak up and be real. Let them know you care. But don't be a sissy.

Women say they want to be treated like an equal. This is not true. Women want to be treated like a WOMAN. Not like a man. If she wanted to be with a woman, she'd do that. She wants to be with YOU. Therefore, be a MAN. This is not to be confused with being treated like a piece of property, not to be confused with being treated with disrespect. Women want to be respected! A woman wants to be respected for being feminine, being a woman. Women are quite different from men. A man who takes the time to understand the difference is a wise man. Bottom line here: NO MORE Mr. NICE GUY. Be a REAL MAN, not a sensitive NICE GUY. Because the nice guys usually do finish last.

You still don't get it? Ok, then try this: be your own bad self. I will say that some women are attracted to "Bad Boys". I think there is a certain ruggedness to the bad boy - they break rules, they sometimes behave rudely. But the true gentleman always remembers what matters most. Have an air of mystique, but definitely be you. If, on occasion, that means doing what you want, rather than what she wants, then do it. Just don't make a continual habit of it - that's rude.

8. Women LOVE a man with a plan. Women love men with ambition. Men who know who they are, what we're doing tonight, and what we're doing with our life. If you don't have a plan, get one. I have a plan (a) and plan (b) ready at all times, so that no matter what, it will appear I'm fairly spontaneous, but reality is I usually know where, when, and how the evening or date could go. In dating, it is extremely important that you have a plan when you ask a woman out. They will judge your sense of confidence by how well you have thought out where you will take her and what you will do together. So, think ahead, have a plan, then work that plan. While you're at it make sure you have an alternative plan, too, in case she doesn't like the first one!

It is equally important for a man to know when to call a woman's bluff and let her know when she is pushing his limits. A man who just falls over and laps at his woman's feet is a man who is called "whipped" for a reason. An example is as follows: she asks, "what do you want to do tonight," he says, "whatever you want to do." If this is his consistent pattern, he's whipped. She won't respect him in the end.

9. Women want generous men. Don't be a tight-wad. Give the woman in your life gifts. Like the Chairman of the Board, Ol' Blue Eyes, Frank Sinatra, used to say, "you gotta gift 'em." Well, I figure good enough for Frank, good enough for me. After all, Frank was a MASTER SWOONER. Guys, get this: Frank Sinatra went to Hollywood with a plan to take a lengthy list of top actresses in his movie studio to bed at some point during his career. As the story goes, he pretty much succeeded. Some women will frown when they read this - but guys, I know what you're thinking: "who did Frank get together with?" Well, how about Gina Lollobrigida and Ava Gardner, for starters (I believe it was Angie Dickinson who claimed to abstain). That's like saying Jennifer Lopez, Halle Berry, and Charlize Theron to today's younger actor. So, maybe giving a gift once in a while isn't such a bad idea. Just don't go broke trying to impress her! After all, Frank Sinatra also had a stellar voice, plenty of swagger, and loads of star power to go with his ability to buy a gift or two. Nevertheless, small gifts, especially gifts that show you were listening when she mentioned her favorite candy bar, or when she stopped at that jewelry counter to admire those earrings (but put them back without buying them), or how she commented on how she'd just love that dress in the window of that snazzy clothing store. Well, use your own imagination. But if you don't gift the woman in your life you'll probably be referred to by the woman you love as "cheapskate".

Now, "why," you ask, "do women care about gifts?" Good question. The answer is that one way women relate is through giving gifts - especially when you've paid attention to what they want. Women will gift exchange compliments with each other, too. So just trust me and surprise her with a gift every now and then and see if she doesn't respond favorably.

10. Be a true friend. LISTEN TO HER. Let her share her good times and problems with you. Be there, rather than just promising to be there. Consistent committed positive action is a definition of love. How do you show you are a friend? Are you there when it matters most? Are you there for the small stuff, too?

11. Women want to be loved, despite their flaws, and need to be satisfied mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as much as physically. Unconditional love would be ideal love. How can you love a woman without judgment, conditions, or rules? How would you like to be loved?

Sexually speaking, women define great sex differently than men, using words like soft candlelight, light touch, then becoming more aggressive as their mood rises to the occasion. A man, on the other hand, instantly rises to the occasion. Women want men to be their lover instead of obsessing over their body to just get sex. Rather than treat women as sex objects, treat them as someone to relate with; in other words, a real person! That means taking your time, showing extra attention, and being tender in ways with her to let her know she is special.

12. Women appreciate a man who is creative. Roses are nice. But sometimes it is extra special to think of something that most guys wouldn't do for a woman. It could be something frivolous, but if it is something that you think SHE would like, then why not do it? You might have just made her day.

13. Women want men who offer a sense of security, to know that her partner will be there if she becomes sick or when she grows old or flabby. Giving a woman security is being there through emotional and physical support. An example might be if she has to have surgery. Take the day off and be there for her, hold her hand, and give your full support to her. In other words, postpone that "tee time"! Security comes from trust. Again, this is about being able to rely in your strength of character.

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There is one last way.

There is one last way. Right before you leave, give him your contact info, and walk away. The "hit and run" approach is highly recommended.

It doesn't give him a chance to reject you on the spot, which makes things easier on you, obviously. It also gives him time to digest what just happened, which may not happen to him often. If you skipped the conversation step, or even if you didn't, you may want to give him only a personal e-mail address rather than a phone number, in case he turns out to be the creepy stalker type.


If he's been checking you out the whole time, be bold. Go up to him and ask, "So when are you gonna take me out?" or, "Here's my number, in case you want to take me out sometime."
Send him a note through the waiter. Ask the waiter to deliver it right after you leave. The note can say something like, "Why don't we hang out soon?" or, "How about coffee sometime?" or even a compliment, such as, "I like your hair."


I got my first kiss when I was 15. I was out with a really good guy friend of mine, and we were just starting to date. He's 17, but we're very, very close. He picked me up and we drove around for a while just talking and listening to music. Later we drove to a park and we just walked around and talked.

It was nice, and he didn't pressure me to do anything physical with him. Afterwards, he had to pick something up for his sister so we went to the library. The whole date was really enjoyable, just because it was so casual and involved a lot of talking. When he dropped me off at home, I gave him a hug in his car and then he just leaned in and kissed me! Definitely on my top memories list. - Anonymous, Arizona, 15

Tell the guy he's the spitting image of a college friend, or whatever. Ask if you can take a picture with him, because you've got to show your mom/friend/sister this "long lost twin".


After taking a picture with him (during which you should get close!), ask him if he has a MySpace or Facebook profile, so that you can link with him. Once you have his profile, you have a connection!

Start a conversation.

Start a conversation. You may skip it if you are terrified by the thought of starting a conversation with a stranger (a good-looking guy, no less). But if you skip this step, you are depriving yourself of a valuable screening tool.

What if this guy is a total weirdo? Or just too dull, too quiet, too loud, too macho, too meek, or just not your type? Besides, you're going to have to talk to him at some point, anyway. It's better to find out now that he has horrific breath, or that he can't stop talking about his mother or ex-girlfriend, rather than make the discovery on your first date, when your escape route will be a little narrower.

My First Kiss was in high school FRESHMEN year...I was 14 years old, i couldn't breathe with the kiss.We were in the gym watching a performance of drilling since i'm in a Military school. We were sitting together and then we both turned around and when we turned back all of a sudden our lips were touching each other. It almost took my breathe away and i jzt had to stop it because it was killing me..But other than that it was the best thing ever. - Yiovana, Chicago, IL.


My first kiss was so great! After reading some of the stories I knew I was ready. It was during spring break after a long day of my bf Chris teaching me how to skateboard. He lives right down the street and he had to go home for dinner. We were in my back yard and he was like I have to go....................................and I went in to hug him when BAM! I kissed him! It was awsome, we are still together (and I'm still NOT a good skateboarder!) - Brookelyn, 13, INDIANA

Close the deal.
Alright. Now it's time to get his phone number! If you had been successful is making a conversation with him, you can say something like, "You're fascinating! I like talking to you. Can I call you sometime?" You could even go a step forward and ask him out on a date instead. This is recommended only after you've actually talked with the man. You will want to make sure that his personality is as fascinating as his looks (and that he isn't a weirdo). Talking on the phone is one thing, but actually spending time together can be awkward, uncomfortable, and a waste of time if he is not the type of man you are looking for, so, yeah, scope him out first.

If you can't get a conversation going (like, if you are too nervous), then you must take the direct route. You are going to cut through the steps of saying hi, doing introductions, and talking about the weather, before asking him for his phone number. You are just going to ask him for him phone number. This might call for a pickup line. Yes, you will feel cheesy, and he might think so too, but if he's hot... It can't hurt to try, right? Just keep your request respectful. So, avoid saying anything questionable. Otherwise, you'll look like a fool and he'll refuse (or just brush you off). However, don't be put off if you can't think of something clever or funny. Even a lame pick up line can be endearing if you LOOK attractive and SMILE.

You can just say, "I like your shirt. Can I have your number?" or "Wow, what's a guy like you doing in a place like this. Can I have your number?" Yes, terrible pick up lines, but unless you haven't washed showered in days, they should work. The novelty of being picked up by a friendly, not-creepy woman is enough to make most men smile and reciprocate. Like I said, focus on your appearance. Wearing clean clothes, flossing your teeth, and getting enough sleep should keep you covered. If in doubt, you can try beautification with make up and fashion, but it's not absolutely necessary. Smiling, being friendly and staying on top of personal health and hygiene is all you need to always be prepared to pick up men.

Flirt from a distance

Flirt from a distance. Make eye contact, smile, and look approachable. Make sure that your body language is open and that you look approachable. "More than 50 percent of all communication is done via body language and gestures," explains body-language expert Janine Driver says. A good way to open your body language is to lean on something. This closes you off and makes you look unapproachable.

When i was almost-14, i had been dating my [now ex]boyfriend for about, hm, a month or two. I know i know, first kiss after 2 months? i'm crazy. it was my first relationship, and, i must admit, i was nervous. anyway, it was almost christmas, and i wanted to do something special for my guy. so, with the help of my friend, i borrowed a little bit of mistletoe and snuck it into my house without my parents noticing. (they're a tad overprotective.) when i was in my room, i tied a little bow on it and wrapped it in a little box.

?The next day, when we were in school, my bf and i exchanged presents. i got a gorgeous bracelet, and i gave him a hoodie i bought at the local mall. then i whispered to him, "i left your other present in my locker. i'll give it to you later." that way he would be left thinking, and it wouldnt completely give away the fact that it was a kiss. so, when my best friend and i got back from band practice, i asked her to tell my bf to come out into the hallway. it wasnt that hard for him to get away..my lit teacher is the best and my class was just talking about christmas break, blah blah blah. i was putting in my locker combo when he walked up to me.

I asked him if he was ready for his present..and of course he said yes. so i gave him the box, he unwrapped it, and then looked into my eyes with a look of surprise and, satisfaction. and we kissed. it was a little, soft, closed-mouth kiss that sent chills down my spine and left me shaking the whole rest of the day. we got back to the room (at separate times of course!) and both sat quietly until the final bell.

We said bye to each other and returned to our separate homerooms. later that night he texted me telling me he loved his present. about another month later he broke up with me because we were going to different high schools "and it would be hard". so he immediately hooked up with my (so i thought) best-ish friend. now me ex and i dont talk to each other. at all. the end (: - Anonymous, 14, NJ

How to Pick Up Men!

Who says you have to wait, batting your eyelashes and hoping that handsome guy will introduce himself? Take life by the horns and pick that man up! But what you should do is pick up the man you wanna snag the right way.

I mean, I know we have to go back to the 8th grade, but make sure he's single first. Now the worst place to pick up anyone guys/girls alike is at a bar. Because when you pick up someone at a bar you're only talking to the alcohol and not the real person. If you really have given up on meeting people the old fashion way you might want to refer to the electronic way and I'm not talking about facebook, and myspace is I'm talking about eHarmoney, match.com and others. So like my mom always says "There is always that special person for the special someone, always."

We have been dating for 10 years now but we have never kissed before.I was 10 and she was 9 when we started dating.

I have never kissed and same applies to her.One day i was alone with her and after talking for a long time,we were both staring at each other.We both moved forward to kiss but were both to shy and we could not do it.Just yesterday 28th,March 2008,i was at work when she called me that her dad wont accept me because i attended a different church from hers.She was afraid she will loose me and i felt same too.We both wept and i asked for a day off.

When i came home,i called her so we find a solution to this,She came over and we talked for a while when we both she started crying,i told her that whatever should happen,i will certainly put a ring officially on her ring finger,she understood what i said and then stopped crying.

I held her head in my palm like a cup,moved in gently with my lips closed and tight,when i got to her lips my eyes were shut and hers too.Our lips touched and we gave a light opening as our tongues touched.I felt as if an something like an electric shock through me and she almost fell from my hands.She said she felt something strange through her.But we both like the passion we felt too so she moved in again and we kissed passionately than before for a quite longer now.We were full of passion and love.


She liked it and i liked it too.We kissed for a third and fourth time and the feeling was more anytime we kissed.When it was time to leave,she asked me to kiss her again,we kissed and this time it was a very long kiss with our tongues tangling in our tightly fixed mouth,the passion and love we both felt was too much and very enjoyable.After that she gave me a huge hug and i went to escort her home.We were both novices to the kissing job but had a very good kiss for the first time in our lives because we both did it at the right time and with someone we really love.

She is my first love and i am her first love too.After ten years of dating,i am 21 now and she is 20,we had our first kiss.Its an enjoyable and pleasurable moment we both will never forget in our live.We are still virgins.We are both writing this together.... - Samuel(21) and Vivian(20) from Ghana

Pick a good spot.
The good old bar scene isn't for everybody. Who says you can't meet the love of your life at a dog park, or a toy store? What about a museum, or an art gallery? Then there are spots that are notoriously saturated with testosterone: the gym, an Apple store, a political rally, a sports bar, or a grad school coffee shop (especially if the grad school is heavier on male enrollment, with programs in engineering, computer science, and business).

Make it an Activity

Make it an Activity

Unfortunately the movie-dinner combo is still a first date standard. What’s unfortunate about going with a tried and true classic?

Well, this is how those dates generally play out: a guy & a girl in a restaurant, sitting across a table from each other making mundane & awkward small talk, avoiding eye contact as they anxiously wait for their meals to arrive. Then when the food does arrive begins the struggle to maintain a conversation while eating and trying to look good at the same time.

Then comes the movie where they sit in silence for an average of 2 hours and their only interaction is likely to be sharing a box of popcorn.

Forego the typical/cliché dates and invite her to do an activity. Anything interactive that keeps the conversation moving forward such as bowling, ice skating or going to an amusement park is a good idea.

This alleviates the pressure for both of you. and allows focus to fall on the activity giving you the opportunity to forge an attraction, get to know each other and increase your comfort level with some casual physical contact in a much more relaxed atmosphere.

This can give you the opportunity to make her to miss your presence. If you have quality friend they may even put in a good word for you.


This is why inviting her to group event can be a good idea. Group events provide natural conversation starters as there are a variety of things going on. If your friends are in attendance you can introduce her and leave her to get to know them a bit, leaving you free to network and talk to other friends.


Note: There is no need to do all the work. Taking a woman to a place that simulates her in a positive way makes her associate those positive feelings with you.
I was at the movies with my boyfriend and we sat in the second-to-last row. Hardly anyone else was in the theater, and no one was sitting behind us. Then, just as the movie started, some random old lady just came in, climbed the stairs, and sat right behind us. We were a little freaked out, but soon forgot her. A romantic scene began, and my boyfriend leaned in to kiss me, but stopped (he said later that he was thinking about whether I wanted him to kiss me).

I leaned towards his face and kissed him instead :) It was very cute! We smiled at each other and laughed quietly. Then he kissed me again. As the second kiss started, I heard a WUMPH! and my boyfriend jerked forward in his seat, hitting my nose and breaking the kiss. I looked at him and he was equally stunned. We turned around and the old woman behind us was glaring down disapprovingly. She had kicked the back of his seat! Needless to say, we made sure to sit in the back row after that! - Anonymous, 15, TN



Chances are both of them will leave the date without feeling terribly attracted or excited about each other because they have missed out on the opportunity to get to know each other and build a genuine connection. This doesn’t exactly sound like an ideal first date, does it?

Invite Her to Something....

As strong as your initial attraction may be, there is not necessarily any need to set aside special time to hang out with her just yet. After all, you’ve only just met and you don’t want to her to think you have nothing but time on your hands. What you do want her to think is that you are a quality guy with a lot going on in his life.

When inviting her, do so in such a way that’s says “I will be doing this activity anyway, but we will have a lot of fun if you come along with me”. Instead of setting aside special time for just the two of you, you are inviting her to come along and be part of your life.

By inviting her to an activity you had already planned on attending you forego planning & paying for an elaborate date and start getting to know her in a more comfortable atmosphere.

This alleviates much unneeded pressure and if she is unable to attend it’s not big deal and you haven’t wasted any time.

This happend a couple of weeks ago. Im 13 and was at the last mixxer of the school year. My boyfriend is really shy, but at the same time hes really corny. Which I love! So we were in a slow dance to the song "When You Look Me In The Eyes" by The Jonas Brothers. (BEST SONG EVER) We were really close and he was the one who pulled that close. Which really surprised me! We were more in a hug position than in a dancing one. He asked me...

"Do you know how long we've been going out?' "Uhhhh... I think about 7 months now, we're getting close to 8!" "7 months and 16 days... and counting"
Then he just started to look at me. I wasn't looking at him, but I could see it out the corner of my eye. I was hesitant but I looked at him. There was a 3 second eye contact... then I started to lean in, and then him, and we KISSED!(pssst... on the lips!) Oh my God! It was beautiful! Thats how every girl wants their first kiss to be isnt it? I'm such a lucky girl to have him in my life! - anonymous, 13 yrs, Fairway, KS


hi..my now boyfriend is this guy named aiden. heres how it began with a kiss
i was perfecting my surf moves at the beach and then aiden with that blonde hair and blue eyes comes over and says "hey" im like "hi" and when hes talking he leans closer and puts both hands on my face and says softly "come here" and kisses me softly on the lips twice then holds me because i tell him im cold. - anonymous, la, california

Sending the first text

Sending the first text can be a nerve wracking experience for many guys. Often spending hours of thought and deliberation trying to formulate the perfect choice of words to kick off their new text romance. After all that time and thought the results are usually something brilliant like:

“Hey what’s up?”
“What are you up to?”
“Hey cutie, it was nice meeting you last night. Want to hang out tonight?”
“Hey it’s {name} from the bar/party/club last night. What’s up?”
“How is your day going?”
“Do you remember me? – {your name}”

On top of failing to produce any positive emotional reactions in her they also destroy any of the initial attraction that you built up when she first gave you her number.
These types of text or typical, boring and she is likely to have received the exact same text from countless other guys who may be pursuing her. Instead of making yourself distinctive you have put yourself in the same mundane/uninteresting category as every other guy.

For years I envisioned my perfect first kiss. I tried to imagine what it would be like when a boy's lips actually touched mine for the first time. In my fantasies though, it was always a mystery figure. Well, a week before my fourteenth birthday, my best friends threw me this amazing surprise party! Of course they invited my crush. We hung out all night. Then someone put on a really scary movie. Me and a few friends (including my crush) retreated into the corner to play truth or dare. One of them dared him to kiss me, and it was really awkward so after we just stared at each other for a while, she changed the dare to cheek. So he did. Anyway, the game kind of fell apart shortly after that. I started to stand up when I got a glimpse of the movie on the screen.

A guy shoved this live bird into his mouth. Usually stuff like that doesn't scare me, but it caught me really off guard and I screamed really loud. Me crush ran over and put his arms around me and just kind of held me for a few minutes. Well, then of course I just started screaming whenever something remotely scary happened in the movie so he would hug me.

After doing this a few times he decided it would be best to remove me from the movie so he took me to the wall on the other side of the room. Several friends followed us. We were talking when, despite his efforts, I saw a guy in the movie blow up while sitting on a toilet.


Of course, I screamed and he hugged me and took me to another corner of the room. We sat there holding each other for a while when all of a sudden, I saw him leaning in. I stopped thinking just about then. I didn't freak out or anything, it just seemed really natural. His lips pressed against mine for several seconds until he slowly pulled away when our friends followed again. I guess he didn't care because just a second later he kissed me again, while three classmates looked on. It was the most amazing first kiss I could ever ask for, and he asked me to be his girlfriend a week later (on my birthday)! - Anonymous, 14, CA

False Disqualifiers

She will be considerably more at ease when it comes time for your date if you make her aware that you may have reservations about meeting up. More than likely, she already has some of her own and by making yours known first, you steal her ‘frame’.

Instead of focusing on hers she is now trying to discredit your reservations or validate your requirements to prove to herself trustworthy and deserving of your time. Although false disqualifiers and stipulations may seem absurd they are incredibly effective ways to conquer any hesitations she has about seeing you again.

Examples:
“A group of us r going to {event/place} 2night and I’m thinking about inviting you, but only if you promise not to embarrass me :)~”
“So now that we’re txt buddies you might be safe enough to invite to one of our next get-togethers:-)”

“You are invited if you promise to bring bucket loads of… fun energy!”

I had my first kiss when i was 12...it was really nice. My older sister said that it would be disgusting at first but then it gets a whole lot better. lol. Well i liked this older guy, he was 13.

We snuck out to the park and walked around for a bit. When we were outside my house, as i was walking away he grabbed my hand and pulled me into a kiss. It was amazing, he was really gentle and used his tounge and everything. He didn't even know it was my first time, and it was really romantic. When he pulled away he said i was an amazing kisser, and then i started to laugh, and then he kissed me again. We were making out for like 15 minutes, untill a car drove by. Ever since then we kiss whenever we see each other. - S.A., anonymous

As you can see, Brittany has no reservations about meeting up whatsoever, because Ryan showed that he might have had reservations first. She then qualified herself by saying that she has a very good fashion sense. It is always a good sign when a girl you like qualifies herself.

Who Else Wants to Learn The Text Skills That Women Wish Men Had?


• Is meeting women a typical behavior for you?


• Do you have high Social Value?


• Are you easily manipulated or do you have a strong sense of personal identity?

• What kind of personality do you have? Will you be able to excite her and make her laugh?

Are you needy or do you have other things going on in your life?


These are just a few examples of what she may subconsciously determine from your text messages. These things will help her decide whether or not she thinks you are worth moving forward with. Though it may seem like a lot of pressure for a few lines of text, don’t worry.

You are about to learn the fundamentals behind creating text messages that will put you ahead of the game and give off all the right signals. But first we need to understand why what most guys do does not work.

It was our first date, and i brought the movie disturbia over to her house. We were sitting on her couch in her basement and i was holding her hand she put her legs over mine and her arm across my chest, i had my other hand rested in her leg. I was falling in love with her and we had only seen each other a few times. I felt her looking at me, i could feel her beside me just looking at me, i turned my head and looked into her eyes, my stomach filled with butterflies. I turned my head and closed my eyes. God, her warm soft lips tasted so good,

I pulled away and then kissed her again. later that night as we said our goodbyes, we stood at the bottom of her stairs and before i could turn to leave she put her arms around me and i placed my hands on her hips, we kissed again, and before i knew it her mouth was open and so was mine... I felt her tongue on my lips, i felt the adrenaline and the butterflies, i felt so numb and tingly, i felt so much all at the same time. It was amazing. - Joshua, 16, Colorado

For example...

Chances are you are not the only guy pursuing the girl(s) you are interested in. The ability to separate your self from the pack and make yourself known as her best choice is a must.

Almost any guy can get a girl’s phone number, the problem is that they completely forget (or had no idea in the first place) how to interact when it comes time to text her. It is important to, at each step, validate in her mind that the right choice is to move forward with you and not the next guy in line.

Though you are more than likely unaware of it, those 1-3 lines of text you are sending her are telling her a lot about the type of guy you are.

I got my first kiss 3 years ago. It was March 10, 2005 I was just 16. My boyfriend, who was also my classmate, decided not to attend graduation practice since we already know what do to. We went to the mall and started window shopping until i felt really sleepy.

I then suggested for him to get us a room since we can't do home yet because our parents didn't know about out relationship yet. By the time we got our room, I then decided to sleep. I didn't know what was going on with him that he doesn't want me to sleep. Instead, we curled together on the bed and started talking about things. Finally, he said "Ummm, my dad said i have to ask the question before i could do things to you." I replied ..

"SO? ... um .. " (but i was really thinking why need to ask? .. .) my boyfriend is somewhat the prim and proper kind and I was his first girlfriend. I said "SURE" ... I kissed him in a zap! He said "I was supposed to do that!" ... then i replied " Oh, Sorry ... You're so slow hon" ... Then he kissed me .. but this time it was slow and very passionate ... and one thing led to another ... but we never had sex... just until the boobs part .. haha ... temptation .. - JerseyGirl, 19, Philippines, CDO

Have a Sense of Humor

Have a Sense of Humor
The exact opposite emotion we are trying to provoke is one of seriousness. It is common for a woman to build an attraction solely based on his sense of humor. Even if she initially doesn’t feel an attraction to you, a good sense of humor is so powerful it can make you seem completely irresistible and in turn, make her fall for you.
A sense of humor is consistently ranked as the most important attribute a man can possess. The reason is simple; Humor indicates that you don’t take yourself or the interaction too seriously

There is nothing as powerful as a good sense of humor to being a woman’s guard down and make her feel relaxed. When she is laughing she is comfortable and happy, and if you are the one making her laugh, she is going to associate you with those positive feelings.


When she is laughing she is no longer judging or evaluating you. You make her aware that you are fun to be around. Your sense of humor will also put you in a light-hearted mindset and make you take yourself less seriously.

Hey this is my first kiss story. Its not especially cool but i thought id send it i anyway. Ok so i was with my girfriend at her house. Me and her had only been going out for a couple of weeks and i had wanted to kiss her 4 ages. Anyways we were taking a walk round hr house and i saw this cool mountain hill thingy we could climb and be alone. So we were lying up on this hill looking up at the sky and i was holdig her close to me and everything was quiet and perfect.

Suddenly i looked up and saw 4 little 10 year olds staring at me open mouthed and giggeling and i thought to myself: "Oh god please not now!" wen i realized these annoying kids werent gonna leave i wispered to my girlfreind that w should go hide in the trees till thy went away. So we did. Wen they left the day was almost over and the sun was setting. We went down to this beach and we just stood there messing around. Then i just took her by the waist, looked into her beutiful blue eyes and kissed her. It was so perfect;) we are stll together and i hope we will be for a long time. Shes the most amzing girl i have ever met but if sh finds out i wrote this she would kill me. - Anonymous J, 14, Stavanger, Norway

The Pick Up Artist- effective way's

Another effective way to communicate emotion and tone is through emoticons. You can spell them out in parenthesis, i.e. :) becomes (smiley face). Any variation of these can be used. By using them your can portray feelings of playfulness & sympathy, or simply let her know that you are in a good mood. Even an overly cocky statement can seem less so when using emoticons.

My first kiss was amazing. ok my ex boyfriend (boyfriend at the time) and i were going for a walk one night. his family was there and we were walking his dogs. when we got back to my house, it was dark, and his parents left us to talk. so we were ust standing there and it was kindof akward because we were both thinking the same thing. then he was like, ''you know it is gonna happen sometime right?'' then i was like, ''yeeeaaaahhh i am just nervous!'' then he said' dnt worry itll go fine'! so he got so close to me and our forheads touched and we stared into eachothers eyes. then i kind of gave a nervous squeal ( dont ask) and he moved back. he was like, ''did i do something wrong?''

I was like' no i am just nervous".. then he was like, "ok do u even want to?" i was like' yea... i dnt know wat to do tho" so he kind of guided me through it. he had nver kissed anyone either, but he had seen it. so he put my arms around his neck, then he put his arms on my waist and pulled me veeerrrryyy close to him, i could feel his breath on my lips. then he moved in and our lips touched. then he pulled back and i blushed and smiled, so he moved in again and held me so close and passionatly, i didnt want to leave. then we got kind of used to it and we opened mouth, but no toungue. then he slowely moved his toungue into my mouth and french kissed me.


I didnt do anything with my tounge because i was nervous. but after we just hugged and i said, " i liked that alot, i am glad we did that!" then he was like, "me too we definatly should do that more" and he smiled. his mom called and said he had to go so he gave me a goodnight kiss and left. i was so happy i will never forget it. we did end up breaking up a few weeks later, but we are still best friends. - Kelli, 14

The Pick Up Artist- Your first text message

So you’ve got her number. Well done.

But now are you wondering what you should text her?

Lots of guys will spend hours thinking about sending the first text, wracking their brains for the “perfect” thing to send her…
and then the best they come up with is “hey, what’s up?”
Read on to learn a better way…

Your first text message is making your first impression all over again. You need to show her that you’re that fun, cool guy who she met in person. And most of all, you want her to respond so you can start a conversation over text, and ultimately get her to meet up.
How To Flirt over Text Messages

It’s important when you’re learning how to text girls that you steer clear of the normal, “boring” text messages. If you’re texting a very beautiful girl, she is probably ALREADY getting texts from normal, needy guys, so we have to stand out.


My first kiss was when i was 15. it was with this guys that i thought only the popular girls could get. he was 16 and he was the funny kid. i first saw him in my science class and i tfell in love with him and couldnt take my eyes of his plaid jackets. but later that day i foud mout that he a as girlfriend and i was really depressed so i forgot all about him. then a few weeks later i found out that he broke up with her. so i started liking him again an i knew i had no chance because he was way out of me league.

A few weeks later i was at my house and my dad said that a few of his friends were coming over to help fix our fence and i didnt think anything of it. So later on i was upstairs doing my homwork and the doorbell rang, i went downstairs to get the doodr and when i answered and let him in and as soon as i closed the door the bell rang again and when i opened it i saw him and i couldnt belive my eyes. i was shocked and i ran upsatirs, i started calling all my friends and while talking to them i watched him put up the fence from my balcony. soo to skip to the better part......my dad and his friend found out they needed this speacial part for the fence and they had to go to copenhagen to get it. rerlived yet sad that he had left i went downstairs to get a snack but yet to my surprise he was still there . "hey im in your spanish class" me: "oh ya hi im anna" "i know"

( i thought was an idiot for saying that)

Then started to talk and he was really cool and not what i expected at all. we sat in the gazebo and it started to get dark and really cold and he offered me his PLAID jacket. when he was putting the jacket on me and he turned me really close to his face and stared into my eyes for a while and said "you really dont know how beautiful you are" (and i didnt know what to say maybe this was a joke and he was goinna go back to school and tell all his friends what he did and i would be the laughing stock of my school) and then before i could say "funny joke" he pulled me in and kissed me on the lips and as ours lips met the song "oh oh oh its magic was playing. - anna, 15, soulvang

Engaging Her Emotions

Engaging her emotions is undoubtedly the most effective & commanding element of a first text message. When reading your first few messages the goal is to provoke her into experiencing the same feelings of attraction as she felt during your initial meeting.

An easy way to accomplish this is by referencing a subject from your first conversation together. By doing this you bring her back to that time with you and, in turn, bring up the positive feelings she felt in that moment.


If you begin where you left off your relationship will move along much faster pace.
Those positive feeling that you are stirring up are the very basis of her attraction to you (as well as you to her). It isn’t necessary to start over or to reconstruct her positive feeling towards you.

Note: If you got her number in a situation that didn’t allow for much time to talk or build a connection it is crucial that you put the techniques from Using Social Networking Sites into play to increase attraction & establish comfort.

Ok so me and my boyfriend have been going out 4 like 5 months. Everyone was pressuring us to do it! & I really wanted to and he did to but he just didn't have the nerve to do it because we have had like 5 chances to do it and he still didn't do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, finally he did it! Ok so our school was doing the play Annie and after the last performence of Saturday night we had a cast party. So of course we both went and so every one was dancing on the stage and 3 of my friends were like telling us and telling us to do it so out of no were he comes up infront of me, puts his arm around me and kisses me!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can never 4 get that moment. There is no other feeling like you have when u get your first kiss!!!!!! - 12, North Carolina, USA

Expressing love

My first kiss kind of sucked. So, there was this boy named Tyler at my school, and the only class we had together was 6th per. gym.

I got to know him pretty well over the 5 months we were in that class, and two days before school let out, we sort of asked each other out. It was awkward, and it didn't even seem like we were dating, haha, just better friends. We hugged a couple of times, and exchanged phone numbers, and then it was the last day of school!! We walked out of gym together, right after they announced it was SUMMER, and we were standing under this tree, and we hugged. Then, he pulled away, and leaned in and pecked me. God, it was so awkward. He said bye, and we turned around and walked different ways.

Haha, I saw my friend, Maddy, and I was like," Ew! Tyler just kissed me!" And she laughed and made fun of me. Then, I went to go tell my best friends, Lauren and Sophia, who totally freaked out. Yeah, I guess I don't really count it. People shouldn't date in Junior High anyways, that's my theory. - Maddie, Washinton, 13 (kiss at age 12)
To celebrate this wonderful day of expressing love, I’m sharing one of my favourite kissing scenes to write. It was a toss between the kiss in His Treasure and the one in A Valentine Challenge.
My first kiss was super romantic and sweet. I had been dating the guy a couple for a weeks and I was dying to kiss him. But I thought he didn't want to, so I pretty much gave up. One day after school, we went to house for the first time to hang out. But when we got there, he couldn't find his house key (he found the next day in the bottom of his backback :)

We went into the backyard and sat on a swing. I was freezing, so he sat a little closer. Slowly, without me really noticing, he edged closer and closer to me until his arm was around me. My heart was pounding like crazy, and my my mind went completely blank. I cuddled in closer and put my head on his collarbone (he smelled so sweet!) at this point neither of us was speaking.

I turned my head up a little bit at a time. And just when I was about to give up, he looked deep into my eyes. We both smiled and, at the same time, closed the 2 inches between us and kissed... The longest 10 seconds of my life, and the sweetest too. We kissed exactly 4 times, and then I said I had to go (my plan to keep him wanting more :P He said, "no, don't go" and tried to kiss me again, but I just touched his cheek and stood up. He walked my to where my parents picked me up. We dated for 8 months, and we went our own ways. But I will always remember that kiss... - Eva, Portland, OR